Missy

Tracy's blue-eyed deaf kitten slipped out of our door unnoticed by everyone. Her absence was only noticed when the time for her med came. It's signal number 1, very windy, dark and raining--we all went outside the house to the street to look for Missy.

After 3 hours of looking around the neighborhood, we gave up. While eating our dinner at 9:30pm, Tracy started crying. What can a mom do but to console her child. We all hoped that Missy will come back tomorrow morning. Oh, we all decided to resume our search tomorrow morning. I have an appointment at 9am tomorrow but I decided to cancel it to join my daughters' search for our Missy.

As I watch my daughters who are quietly sitting in-front of our television....I know they are thinking about our kitten...it's raining outside and Missy's undergoing treatment for her deafness, abnormal tear gland and colds....I can feel what's in their minds.

I wanted to join with them but I kept my composure. Instead I spent my time in Farmville. But my mind is wandering.....where is Missy?

As I stand by the door looking at the road which Missy might have taken, I can't help but remember that way back then someone left without any reason and never came back....

The loss brought so much pain and tears.

Missy brought back the memory.

I didn't cry. I just remembered..I don't remember the pain anymore but I can't forget the face.Now that person is coming back after much realization but I already closed the door behind. I decided not to look back again.

That's why I like it this way. I'm tired of goodbyes. I'm tired of losing. I'm tired of moving on again and again. Simply...I'm tired.

Next time?

Next time.....