Introspect

I give this feelings to You,

something I never wanted.

for I know in my spirit only You can help ~

my Lord,

can take and replace.

heal my heart, take away this feeling

of sadness that my being alone in life brings.

instead remove the scales from my eyes

and let me see

and enjoy every moment I have with my loved ones..

that going home to you early be departed from my mind,

just to be at peace,

just to stop thinking,

when will this feeling end.

Help me to enjoy every moment

and never look for things that are not here.

find solace and contentment,

not asking for anything in return,

not looking for what is impossible to be mine.

to understand deeply,

to love unconditionally,

to cherish every moment that is given to me.

I let go...

let go of this madness to You.

I choose to die to myself as I climb into Your presence again,

so I may live again..

alone or not

I live by my name.

Hear my Lord.

Hear oh God.

Why

It's already noon and still I'm sitting here..I have work to attend to but I simply don't want to go to work. It's one of those days again.... I want to hit the road, go North and enjoy the fresh breeze of the northern counties. All I want to do is go places. I am not depressed...am simply is tired...my mind is already tired thinking of things.... a lot of things.

If I will be given another life to live after these...then I have nothing more to wish to do but enjoy the chance of happiness the Lord designed for me. I'd like to see it and feel it and stay with it till the last minute of my time life...the chance to be with someone a much longer time. A someone whom I can call mine.

Is it bad? Is it offending? Nope. I'm so sure it's not. God knows it and He feels the same way we do and He knows what's lacking. Today, am enjoying the gift of freedom. Doing things for my family and other people I do not know. Staking my life for them, forgetting myself. Yes, I have nothing for myself.. I know it! My friends said, set aside for myself...money I guess it must be. But, all I know one day, He will set aside something for me...only for me.

So much for it...it's the wish of all single women in the world...and it's not an ugly wish!

What can I be afraid of? Fear has numb my soul since then..
Why should I be afraid of death? I have died already a lot of times.
Why should I be afraid of being alone? I've been alone since the beginning.
What am I to lose? I have lost everything already.
Why should I hope for more? Because there's more things up there for me.

Love your life..it's a precious gift from God until you know it.

Nothing More Beautiful

There is nothing more beautiful than
a flower blooming,
a sunrise,
and
a sunset.

A bird flying in the horizon,
a rainbow,
and you..

looking at me,

just looking at me.

There is nothing sadder
than a death
of a loved one,

and you,
walking away
from me.

But there is nothing more
rewarding
than an effort compensated,

and me...
overcoming your memories.

There is nothing more refreshing
than a cold drink after a hot weather,
and thinking
of our past,
how it made me
change,
and grow into
a person
more
beautiful
than
there
was
you.

and I am glad!

Climbing Mt. Moriah the 2nd Time

Mt. Moriah was the mountain where Abraham offered Isaac to God, as requested by God to test Abraham. The offering of Isaac did not materialized because God sent a ram in place of Isaac.

Bible teachers use this story to tell about letting go of things when the Lord request it to for reasons we sometimes do not know. Only He knows.

I moved to that "mountain" when I went to China. As the Lord commanded me to. My letting go of the school, and the people who made my life sad, my fears, my pains, and sadness, took place when the airplane took off the ground! There was an amazing peace within! And the Almighty went ahead of me to China!

I was ready then to change my career, my financial and my social status. I took the "silent mode" that made a lot of friends wondered! That silent mode is still on today.

I didn't regret my decision, though a tough one. I can't explain the serenity inside.

When I returned to the Philippines this month, after 2 weeks of going back and forth to the tribe, the heavens shocked me with surprises!

Those that I lost was restored to me by the Lord!

And I can feel that many more will come where I will say to God " Indeed, it is well with my soul!"


There was no substitute offering in Moriah. Only a simple trust and letting go.


"It is well with my soul."

Silence Overtook Me

A lot of books offers advises on lots of life's issues. Many coaching groups give mindsetting truths to many business and life matters. None of them will say that meeting and succeeding on your issues are easy. All of them will say that..."it all depends on you!"

Yes, a lot of people that surrounds you seem like experts on a lot of issues and things and you get confused!

Above all things, above all words and advises.. the truth that matters is you!






And the truth that matters now is me!

Me, because I chose to listen to only One- the One who designed my life.
Me, because I chose to take a break and breath for a while.
Me, because I decide to love myself again.

I have worked hard for many, many years without a vacation. I have given my time, energy and everything to my family and other people. I have gone tired and lost what's inside... so I took the time out to be silent for a long time.


Silence doesn't always mean anger and sadness.

This time, silence means growth and change.