I know it's quite difficult to understand.
This is how it goes-
Before I accepted Christ into my life, I was the loneliest person on earth. Though I have everything financially, there is nothing in my life that could make me smile. Yes, a smile on my face had a price! I was dying then, deprived of my youth, my family on the rocks, me & my brothers grew up separately from each other. I grew up apart from my parents & my brothers. I didn't know what a family looks & feel. I had no reason to smile nor live.
I was given till 21 to heal or else die. It didn't matter to me. As the disease progress in my body, the more I didn't care...I just flowed. I sought no healing. Let the morning come that I will not wake up anymore. Let the road engulf me..I didn't care where I might succumbed to its attack.
Then my mom knew Jesus Christ and believed Him, followed Him. And she patiently shared the gospel to my wayward father who was then with another woman. Her prayers, she said was day & night for my dad and us.
Her prayers were answered by God. My dad accepted Jesus in his heart. He changed & returned to my mom.
A friend of mine shared to me the gospel and afterwards I received Jesus in my heart. The cloud of loneliness left me and I smiled for the first time. I felt peace in spite of the sickness. But this time, the disease progressed so badly inside my body. Yet I received no healing from God. Until one day, it attacked in a place where it's not supposed to attack-- while am in a bus way home.
I made it in the door of our house and .... i had no more idea what has happened afterwards! All there was, was pain. pain. pain. I was bedridden for 2 months & hope was very bleak! My family had my grave prepared. But my father didn't give up praying for me.
But I have peace then.. a deep peace inside. Though I can no longer talk, my mind speaks. I remember I prayed to God, " Lord, Thy will be done in my life. I am ready to die, yet if You will give me a chance to live, I will serve You."
The Lord healed me in a miraculous way, in the Heart Center, too dramatic to recall. I underwent a series of testing to really be sure that I was healed.
I was healed! Indeed! And this means, I will serve Him and He wants it!
Years passed by but the prayer that I uttered in my mind to God remained alive inside me. Deep inside I know that one day I will return to God to serve Him. I know deep inside that I will serve Him in places I do not know. I know deep inside, He wants me to be a missionary of His Word. When & how, I did not know.
Years more passed by, unforgettable painful years passed by. So painful there are times I felt like giving up. But no! I remained firm & strong and I know God was aiding me along. I learned so much about a lot of things in life during those crucial & very painful years. The learnings I did not know for what they could be.
Then the time came that God called me to serve Him. And I said, "yes" to Him. He brought me to the tribe. Then it was clear that I will serve God among the tribes, the Muslim tribes. God so loved them that they have to know that it is Yahweh who is God and not Allah. And it is Jesus Christ who is the Saviour, not Mohammed. That the tribes' ancestral spirits are not God. And these people need to know that God loves them the way He loves me.
And I took a vow to serve Christ and His cause to the tribes. And so I am doing it up to now. And my life is not enough for what He has done for me.
I found out that callings from God are either inherited or bestowed upon to a person. In our family- it is both. I learned in our family tree that my great grand parents are missionaries. They founded the United Evangelical Church in our country.
In every generational line of every family in our family tree, there rise servants of God. They are either pastors, deacons & bible teachers and in our line falls the missionary call. My parents are missionaries to the tribes. My brothers are pastors. My daughters and my nephews & nieces are musicians & singers. And I, the only missionary in the family after my parents.
It is in this call that my smile never ends. My happiness is in doing it. And it's rewards are in heaven. It is a simple yet purposeful life. A rewarding life with the poor. It is living among them for them to know the Saviour, so they will go to heaven when they die, like me and you.
It is my prayer that God would grant me a husband who will accept my call for I cannot give up God and His service for the sake of love. A man who will love me for who and what I am in the Lord. For it is my vow.
There is nothing more so great than to serve God and spread the cause of Christ.
I am an MK and am proud of it!
